August 2023 Update

Just accessed my dA account today, and found a comment in my inbox asking me to comeback, which was a weird thing to see especially on a site I barely had any reach on towards anything resembling an audience. I don't know if people on here feel the same but I do have a wider reach here on Newgrounds than on dA, I briefly explained over there my current situation and thought that I might as well talk about it here as well.

Bad News:

• I've dropped my studies on Game Arts in Singapore. I was not able to overcome my homesickness and it affected my work. But I've been doing a lot more 3D even after everything, a reason for the lack of drawings.

Good News:

• I've started working on bigger projects, alongside learning new softwares, workflows, and engines. I've done a bunch of script writing for Sorority, and world building for the bigger part of the universe of Redhill.
• I've gone back to college, I don't really see this as good nor bad*, but some people might like to know that I'm still continuing my studies.
• I am generally happy with where I am right now, been making good friends and living day-by-day.

Rant(?)

Reading the cute little post I've previously made on here, I'm glad to see that I've always been optimistic with things, although in all honesty I did not feel good, looking back. My pessimistic side tells me that I was probably just trying to hide or avoid reality that way. But once again, I'll be looking where the grass is greener.

I can't really promise posts, but I am sure that I'll be continuing my art journey. I originally had things planned out since my early teens, but with the amount of uncertainty I've faced in my late-teens, I don't want to hold anybody's hopes up. I don't like making promises I can't keep.

This is probably the most transparent I've been in a long time online. I've always spoken both my heart and mind whenever I post these walls of text, but I tend to omit some of the details out. I don't really mind who sees this I just want to get things off my chest I guess. Though, I doubt anybody would read this entire thing LOL.

Oh I forgot to add something, this isn't really a cry for help or a plea of some sort, I just wanted to branch it off the college situation earlier, but both of my parents have retired during my time in Singapore so money is pretty tight at the moment, the plan was originally to finish the course overseas and find work after; which you guys know didn't really work out. :( Which is why I've been saving a lot more. A requirement we have in school is to do two internships during our time in college; which I learned today is fully shouldered by us students. I've never really been a star student but I will try to maintain a high enough GPA and try to hit the Dean's List (fingers crossed 🤞). The teachers seem to like me, and find my constant beanie-wearing memorable, and I've been able to befriend most of my classmates so far which feels great, after all the loneliness I've felt away from home. This is my second chance at a final shot and I want to make it all worth and end it once and for all. I want to be able to do my own thing and not have to rely on either of my parents. Just a lot of things going through my head right now but I've always had a difficult time realizing the weight of things until it hits me like a truck in the future.

That'll be all for an update, enjoy your day guys!

We'll see I guess XO,

Cyan

I'm Alive!

Just made it through the first term of Game Arts school; I've learned a lot so far and I wanna tell you guys all about it.

We've done a lot of stuff from sculpting a skeleton and the muscles that go with them, modeled a dining set, a nendoroid of our choice, and some weapons/mechs. We also got to texture the models we made!

We also did a bunch of 3D animation like jumping, run cycles, and even got to copy a reference of our choosing. We then ported them into Unreal and made short clips of the characters. Although my first term review went badly due to lack of sleep and burnout. But I wanna do better for the next two terms. I initially enrolled in the school with the plans of specializing in modelling, but at the moment I feel like the basics are enough for me to learn sculpting casually. So I'm shifting my specialization to animation and go back to my old roots.

Apologies if I suddenly disappeared for 2023 with no new art in sight. I've just been real busy with school and only had the time now to let you guys know. It's been four months being away from home and honestly I caught a bit of homesickness earlier around this month, but I was able to distract myself with work to ignore that for now.

With the formalities and sappy stuff out of the way, I wanna talk about future plans I wanna put down just to remind myself of where I'm at now and where I'd wanna be.

• I still wanna draw; despite my education and career heading towards a 3D path. I still want to draw or even animate in 2D; whether that be fanart, or original content.
• I might lessen commissions; I'm not removing them out entirely, but I might make my services exclusive to a certain niche, just so I can earn more but work less. As selfish as it sounds, I have dreams too, I don't want to keep working for someone else's dream. (I'll probably already be doing that with whatever studio I land in.) I want to have me-time during my free time; this is where my personal projects come in.
• I don't want to beat around the bush any longer; there are multitudes of projects I'd like to work on. First and foremost: Sorority. It's an idea I've had in the back of my head for almost 5 years now. As much as I'd like it to be on different types of media, I'd like to have it as a web/comic. Next is a VSRG (Vertical Scrolling Rhythm Game) that teaches you the fundamentals of such games. Rhythm games tend to only have the "rhythm" aspect in their games with lore at most only being tied to the characters you play as. I want a rhythm game with gameplay outside of the music. (UNBEATABLE is doing the right thing, argue all you want about Hi-Fi Rush, I'm sorry but that's not a rhythm game. It's a platformer with hack & slash with tempo at best.) Lastly is an untitled animated story that I'll be referring to as "Project C". It's a dystopian world where majority of humanity have fallen into the hands of AI, (very timely, and hip discussion topic. 😎) With a clear distinction between the rich and the poor. Nothing too big, just your classic robin hood kind of story. Besides two or three more spin-offs to Sorority, I think that's about it with regards to personal projects.
• I want to work on myself more; right now life is hella stressful but I'm always trying to figure how to make things easier. I have terrible time management, and get affected by certain emotions stronger than others. I'm easily distracted by my curiosity with a lot of things, especially when it comes to tech or art.
• I want to get back to streaming; ever since my PC broke down two months before my school in-take, streaming became impossible. I want to return to this when I finish my studies, I genuinely enjoy streaming as entertainment, zero viewers or not. I have a lot of fond memories during the times I've streamed, and I want to have more of those memories.
• Did I ever mention I liked language learning? Learning about cultures and the languages they speak always intrigued me. I want to travel to places and spend time learning there. Some of the languages that I'd like to learn are French, Japanese, Chinese, and Korean.

That's about it for current dreams and aspirations I wish to work on starting next year.

I'll also be celebrating my birthday next month so I'm just waiting on that.

That's it for now, thanks for reading, back to lurking I go!